growing up shy essay

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Growing up shy, there are some advantages to being the "quiet kid" later in life..

Growing Up Shy

In a world where only one third of the population is introverted, being the "quiet kid" in class can be difficult. If you were shy like I was back in the day -- and even if you still are -- you know what it was like to have teachers begging for greater participation on your report cards and relatives asking your parents if you were okay. Being labelled as shy has had a great impact on who I am today, and I'm sure other "quiet kids" can relate to some of these truths.

Let's take a look at what it was like being labelled this way when we were younger and how it's shaped us into the people we are today.

When you're quiet, people let you know that you're being quiet, and so this becomes a sort of confirmation bias. Yes, I'm aware that I'm quiet, and I was probably going to keep being that way. Now that you've pointed it out to me, though, there's even less of a chance that I'm going to speak up because I feel embarrassed about the way I am.

Oh, and when you did decide to speak up, everyone was amazed. When the other kids pointed out that the quiet kid finally had something to say, you immediately went back into shy mode.

We were often forced to be "social" in nearly every situation we were thrown into. This includes, but is not limited to, family reunions, parties and even trips to the grocery store.

And when we weren't being "social," we were told that we were being rude. I already said hello and asked them how they were doing. I just don't know what else to say to this person -- and it's not because I'm rude. It's because I only speak when I have something valuable to say, not just noise to be heard.

So, what does this teach you?

Being told you're too quiet teaches you to reflect on who you are as a person. You would often ask yourself, "Am I less of a person because I'm not as outgoing as my classmates and friends?" After careful thought and consideration, you realized that just because you're different doesn't mean you aren't important . As you've gotten older, you've learned that everyone interacts with others and learns in different ways. Individuality is something to be praised.

You've learned how to make what you say matter. You don't talk just to talk. You talk when you have something important to say.

Since it often takes you some time to be less shy with others, it will become clear to you who your true friends are. Your true friends are going to stick around even when you aren't being outgoing. They're going to understand that there will be days when you want to just stay in and watch movies. These are the friends who understand who you are, and more importantly, make you feel appreciated for who you are.

Working on being more social as you grow older is a rewarding journey. Although being social is an easy task for some, it is not for us introverts. When we do make small victories, such as holding interesting conversations with strangers, it is all the more rewarding, and we start to develop a sense of confidence.

There's nothing wrong with being the "quiet kid." In fact, there are some advantages to it as you age. Sometimes, we are still reserved, but that doesn't mean we don't grow and appreciate the world around us like everyone else. Rather, we are able to see a different side of it -- and although society often makes us feel like being quiet is a trait to be frowned upon, it is anything but that.

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7 new year clichés: break free, embrace change, those that everyone know.

It's 2024! You drank champagne, you wore funny glasses, and you watched the ball drop as you sang the night away with your best friends and family . What comes next you may ask? Sadly you will have to return to the real world full of work and school and paying bills. "Ah! But I have my New Year's Resolutions!"- you may say. But most of them are 100% complete cliches that you won't hold on to. Here is a list of those things you hear all around the world.

1. "I will be serious about working out"

Are you? Odds are you will get that gym membership, go for a few weeks, and completely forget about it. You will realize that autopay is taking $80 out of your account and you either need to cancel or start going again. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be in better shape, but do it at a pace that is right for you. Don't let the change in year dictate it.

2. "New year new me!"

This cliche is the most over used and most underdone. Every year we hear "New Year New Me!!", and the most that comes out of it is someone dyes their hair or gets a tattoo . Yes, these are life changing attributes to a person, and everyone should be commended for trying new things, but don't try to change you just because its a new year. Stay true to yourself.

3. "I'm going to be more outgoing!"

Being adventurous is always a great thing! Stepping out of your comfort zone is always exhilarating, but don't force yourself to do things that make you feel uncomfortable. So are you really going to go out, or will you continue to watch Netflix and go to the same restaurants. The choice is yours!

4. "I'm going to get more organized "

Trying to get organized is a great feat few of us can manage. It's always good to do a big spring cleaning, but trying to completely organize everything is trying to change how you live. I know when I try to do something like get a new planner, I either stick to it or I forget about it.

5. "I'm leaving my bad relationships in the past!"

Bad influences won't go away in your life if you wish them to stay in another year. Work hard at this one if you are going to make it one of your New Years cliches. Toxic relationships should stay in the past, but it is up to you to keep them out of your life.

6. "I'm going to party less"

Party as much as you want. There is nothing wrong of going out and having fun as long as you are safe doing it. If partying is what you enjoy doing, then that is okay. Not everyone conforms to that lifestyle, but if that is your thing there is no shame in that! Don't leave it in another year because you think you have to.

7. "I'm going to get more serious about my career/schooling"

This is the cliche that you should stick to. It's never a bad thing to be more focused on your career and school, as long as you don't lose sight of the important things. If you get serious, make sure you make time for your family, friends, and most importantly, yourself.

The Ultimate Birthday: Unveiling the Perfect Day to Celebrate!

Let's be real, the day your birthday falls on could really make or break it..

You heard it here first: birthdays in college are some of the best days of your four years. For one day annually, you get to forget about your identity as a stressed, broke, and overworked student, and take the time to celebrate. You can throw your responsibilities for a day, use your one skip in that class you hate, receive kind cards and gifts from loved ones and just enjoy yourself.

Having just celebrated my birthday this past Thursday, the most common question I received from people all day and night was, “Is your birthday actually today?” I realized that, for many, they have the misfortune of either having a birthday in the summer , or on a day that wasn’t ideal for them to celebrate on.

Your birthday celebration is a special day, and it is important to make the most out of it. I decided to take the initiative and make a definitive list that will show you the best day to have a birthday, in descending order according to their rank:

If your birthday falls on a Monday, it just might be an unlucky year for you. Monday is, hands down, the worst day to have a birthday. Everyone else is focused on how stressful the week ahead of them will be, and are still recovering from the weekend. If you celebrate the weekend before, that’s too far in advance, and celebrating the weekend after feels too far away. It’s a lose/lose, unfortunately.

While not as unlucky as a Monday, a Tuesday is in a similar situation. Most are still feeling down as so much of the week lies ahead, and often, big assignments are due on Wednesday. Of course, a Tequila and TacoTuesday could be an option (for those turning 21 or older, of course), but that’s about the most you can do.

Taking the fifth spot is Sunday. By the time Sunday comes around, everyone’s pretty exhausted. However, it still is a very relaxing day, that would make for a pretty good birthday. You have the entire day to spend how you want, no class, few commitments, if any. Plus, you can always celebrate the night before. Your birthday technically starts at midnight, right?

4. Wednesday

Honestly, the most I can say about this is Wine Wednesday. The week is still young, though. Hopefully you have an easy Thursday and Friday ahead of you, however, if not, the birthday could go south. Either way, it’s definitely right in the middle in terms of the best day of the week to have a birthday on.

3. Thursday

I can speak from personal experience, this is a pretty great day to have a birthday. My 11 a.m. French exam the next morning wasn’t ideal, however, there’s nothing better than a Thirsty Thursday (again, 21 and up only). It gives you the whole weekend ahead of you. However, it’s right at the beginning of the weekend, and not everyone has the ability to celebrate on Thursday, as it is still a weeknight.

2. Saturday

Saturdays are special because a Saturday birthday is an all day affair. You celebrate from first thing in the morning, all the way through the night. You can grab a dinner with friends, the whole day is yours for the taking. The only downside is that it doesn’t lay right in the middle of the weekend, it’s on the last day.

The final consensus is that Friday is, in fact, the best day for your birthday to fall on. Right in the center of the weekend, you can really make anything you want out of your birthday. You’ve claimed the right to an entire weekend, and all of your week’s responsibilities come to a close at the end of your Friday school day. You can even skip that class you hate so much. Those who have a Friday birthday this year: consider yourself blessed.

In the end, a birthday is a birthday. No matter what day yours falls on, you have every right to live it up, and have yourself a day!

Unleash Inspiration: 15 Relatable Disney Lyrics!

Leave it to disney to write lyrics that kids of all ages can relate to..

Disney songs are some of the most relatable and inspiring songs not only because of the lovable characters who sing them, but also because of their well-written song lyrics . While some lyrics make more sense with knowledge of the movie's story line that they were written for, other Disney lyrics are very relatable and inspiring for any listener.

1. "I would go most anywhere to feel like I belong."

Hercules: "I Can Go the Distance"

Anyone can relate to feeling like you don't belong. From being picked last in gym class to not being as popular as another classmate, you probably understand, to some degree, what it's like to feel out of place. You would do anything to find a group of people or an activity where you feel like you belong and have a purpose.

2. "Tranquil as a forest, but on fire within."

Mulan: "I'll Make a Man out of You."

If people consider you to be very mellow, odds are you are just waiting to let it all out, especially if you are short. Never underestimate the power of a shorty.

3. "If you walk the footsteps of a stranger, you'll learn things you never knew you never knew."

Pocahontas: "Colors of the Wind"

The best way to understand other people better is to look at things through their eyes.

4. "I know we're different but deep inside us, we're not that different at all."

Tarzan: "You'll be in my Heart "

I think we all need this line after this last election. No matter who you or your neighbor voted for, remember that we are all humans and we should treat each other with love and respect.

5. "These guys don't appreciate I'm broke."

Aladdin: "One Jump Ahead"

This lyric never resonated with me until I came to college. I need all of these textbooks? What is that $20 fee even for? I'm broke guys.

6. "When will my life begin?"

Tangled: "When will my Life Begin?"

When I was in middle school, I thought I would experience the best time of my life in high school . When I got to high school, I just wanted to get to college to experience life on my own. Now that I am in college, I am still dependent on my parents for almost everything, because I can't afford anything even with a part-time job. I would just like to know when my life, a life where I can support myself, really will begin.

7. "That perfect girl is gone."

Frozen: "Let it Go"

I spent my entire life trying to be the perfect daughter, the perfect student, the perfect Christian and the perfect person. I realize now that perfection does not exist. I can only aim to be the best version of me I can be. I became much more content with myself once I let the perfect version of myself go. That perfect girl is gone.

8. "Barely even friends, then somebody bends unexpectedly."

Beauty and the Beast: "Beauty and the Beast"

Many high school sweethearts know what it's like to have an acquaintance turn into a friend and then into a lover.

9. "I will ride, I will fly. Chase the wind and touch the sky."

Brave "Touch the sky"

A great song to get inspired, keep going, and work hard to achieve your dreams. Everything is possible if you are determined to make it happen.

10. "The men up there don't like a lot of blabber, they think a girl who gossips is a bore."

The Little Mermaid : "Poor Unfortunate Souls"

I had to make at least one of these lyrics sarcastic. Men, I know not all of you fall into this category, but a whole lot of you don't like long, deep conversations and you don't pay very much attention when it's not a subject you're interested in, like sports . Am I right, ladies?

11. "Forget about your worries and your strife."

The Jungle Book: "Bare Necessities"

This lyric is more inspiring than relatable. However, it does serve as a little reminder to stop worrying about things you cannot change.

12."If you keep on believing, the dream that you wish will come true."

Cinderella: "A Dream is a Wish your Heart Makes"

Never give up on your dreams. If a dream is easy to achieve, it is not a dream. It is a goal. If you give up on a dream, it was never a dream in the first place. It was a desire. If you work hard enough toward a dream, you can make it a reality.

13. "Anywhere I go, I'm home, if you are there beside me."

The Lion King 2: "Love Will Find a Way"

This song is probably not as well-known as the others on this list, however, The Lion King 2 is one of my favorite Disney movies. We all have someone in our lives that make even the worst places feel like home whenever he or she is around.

14. "Up on the shore they work all day, out in the sun they slave away."

The Little Mermaid: "Under the Sea"

You got that right, Sebastian.

15. "When you wish upon a star, makes no difference who you are, anything your heart desires will come to you."

Pinocchio: "When You Wish upon a Star"

This is probably the most well-known Disney lyric of all time. It was so inspiring and the music was so beautiful that Disney decided to use it at the beginning of all Disney movies. Disney was built on following your dreams. If there is one message that Disney communicates in every single Disney movie from Pinocchio to The Little Mermaid, it is "Follow your dreams."

The Six Most Iconic Pitbull Lyrics Of All Time

Mr. worldwide just wants to see you succeed..

It is no secret that Pitbull is a gifted artist, but many fail to remember that he can be a source of great inspiration as well. The following is a list of iconic Pitbull lyrics that we know and love. Read on to feel empowered — if you think you can handle it.

1. Look up in the sky, it's a bird, it's a plane / No, it's just me, ain't a damn thing changed. (From "Timber") Not a day goes by that I don't see Pitbull flying over my rooftop, dressed in white linen from head-to-toe and drinking a Capri Sun. If that image doesn't motivate you to be better, then nothing will.

2. Been around the world like the sun / I've seen more breast than your newborn son. (From "Shake Senora") Need to boost your resume? Trying to impress a colleague? Use this line. Watch them be amazed, first by your worldly experience and then by your rhyming ability. Thank Pitbull later.

3. And it's not our fault that we have all the ladies / But it's hard to see these ladies when your middle name's Equator / All around the globe, matter fact, see you later. (From "Celebrate") Take a lesson from the school of Mr. 305 — it doesn't have to make any sense, it just has to rhyme . Also, it is possible to have all the ladies, even with a middle name like "Equator."

4. In L.A. they get krazy / Miami they get krazy / In New York they get krazy / Atlanta they get krazy / In London they get krazy / In Paris they get krazy / In Rome they get krazy. (From "Krazy")

Pitbull wants you to never stop studying your map of the world. Learn the names of every city. Say them one after another, all the time. However, Pitbull also wants you to know that you can put that dictionary down. Spelling doesn't matter. Kraziness is universal.

5. Modern day Hugh Hef (uh yes) / Playboy to the death (uh yes) / Is he really worldwide? (uh yes). (From "Dance Again") Does Pitbull wait for someone to answer his questions? No, because he's a grown-ass man who knows the answers. Are you going to wait around for someone else to answer your questions, or are you going to be like Pitbull? Be like Pitbull. Be a grown-ass man who parenthetically answers his own questions.

6. This for anybody going through tough times / Believe me, been there, done that / But every day above ground is a great day, remember that. (From "Time of Our Lives") If Pitbull tells you to be thankful, then be thankful, dammit. After all, we live in an amazing time when a man who wears sunglasses indoors can make millions by listing the names of cities and rhyming Kodak with Kodak. Feel #blessed.

11 Essential Expectations for Becoming the Ultimate Cheermeister

Mastering festive expectations: tips to shine as your holiday cheermeister.

So you’ve elected yourself as this year's Holiday Cheermeister, there’s no shame in that. The holidays are your pride and joy, and you've taken on the responsibility to get everyone in the spirit. With only one week until Christmas , here are some things we expect from you, Cheermeister.

1. Counting down every second until the big day

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2. Being the first to put up their Christmas decorations

3. planning all the holiday festivities for your crew, 4. forcing your holiday enthusiasm on others, 5. winning first place in every holiday sweater contest.

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6. Giving the best secret Santa gifts (Puppies for everyone?)

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7. Being the life of all the holiday parties

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8. Getting defensive when someone says Christmas isn't the best holiday. Cheering on your friends through the last week before school vacation

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10. Never missing the opportunity to rock out to Christmas's greatest hits

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11. Lastly, not letting anything break your Christmas spirit!

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growing up shy essay

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Reviewed by Psychology Today Staff

Shyness is a sense of awkwardness or apprehension that some people consistently feel when approaching or being approached by others. Shyness is a response to fear , and research suggests that although there is a neurobiology of shyness—the behavioral repertoire is orchestrated by a specific circuit of neurons in the brain—it is also strongly influenced by parenting practices and life experiences.

  • What Causes Shyness?
  • How to Overcome Shyness

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Shyness emerges from a few key characteristics: self-consciousness, negative self-preoccupation, low self-esteem and fear of judgment and rejection. Shy people often make unrealistic social comparisons, pitting themselves against the most vibrant or outgoing individuals. Believing that others are constantly evaluating them poorly, shy people abandon new social opportunities—which, in turn, prevents them from improving their social skills.

Shyness is characterized by excessive self-consciousness, negative self-evaluation, and negative self-preoccupation, features that involve a sense of self. Since a sense of self develops around 18 months old, one can argue that people cannot be born shy. Around 20 percent of children are born with a highly reactive temperament, but that doesn’t guarantee that they will be shy or unable to change their behavior.

Shyness is driven by both biological and environmental forces. Babies are born with different temperaments, and those with an extremely sensitive temperament are more likely to go on to be shy. Yet supportive, sensitive parenting can buffer against developing shyness or social anxiety .

Shyness can be heightened during adolescence, since teens have to navigate new situations from classes to friendships to puberty. They may fear being embarrassed, rejected, or fully known. Parents can encourage teens to think about how they would act if those fears were irrelevant, and then help them practice cultivating those behaviors and skills.

Shyness is distinct from introversion. Introverts feel energized by time alone; shy people often want to connect with others, but don't know how or can’t tolerate the anxiety and fear of negative judgment that comes with human interaction. Their inclination to turn inward to monitor their own behavior and perceived shortcomings can prevent them from developing relationships.

The cultural values that children absorb from their parents and the larger society influence their social tendencies. Approximately 40 to 50 percent of American adults consider themselves shy, while 30 percent of Israelis and 60 percent of the Japanese say the same. Cultural styles of assigning blame and praise likely contribute to these cultural differences.

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Shy people can successfully address social challenges without altering their sense of identity . Researchers find that it's often best for people to acknowledge their shyness and try to release themselves from feeling self-conscious.

A number of concrete strategies can boost social confidence . Instead of avoiding social events, shy people can schedule them in advance and practice their social skills ahead of time. They can plan a few questions and talking points, and observe the discussion to get their bearings before contributing. They can also work to reframe their mindset, expecting a positive outcome rather than assuming a negative reaction is inevitable.

Preparing for a social situation can shift your focus from what can go wrong to what can go right. Prepare questions for others and anecdotes you’d like to share. Reflect on what you might have in common. Being curious about others and softening your self-criticism can be helpful as well.

Shyness doesn’t disappear on its own. Shy people are most successful when they acknowledge and understand their shyness, and then act based on that self-awareness. They recognize that small talk may not come naturally, so they plan ahead, rehearse questions and anecdotes, and arrive early to feel comfortable in the new setting.

Parents can help shy children cultivate friendships without pushing them to be someone they’re not. Parents can encourage the child’s passions, as friendships can form around a shared activity. They can also teach basic social skills, such as making eye contact, smiling, speaking clearly, and asking “what” and “how” questions.

growing up shy essay

Research suggests that individuals with social anxiety are happier in the company of others. Try these tips to get yourself out the door when you are tempted to cancel plans.

growing up shy essay

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growing up shy essay

Feeling shy can make you feel awkward, uncomfortable, tongue-tied, and stupid when you want to flirt and shine. These 8 strategies can help you connect.

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Dealing with shyness can be thought of as a golden opportunity for personal growth, establishing vibrant social connections, and long-lasting self-confidence.

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Key strategies to help your child break the sound barrier and build communication confidence at school and in the community.

growing up shy essay

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Just getting out of the house doesn't cure loneliness. These strategies might help you feel better if you are lonely.

growing up shy essay

Have you ever wondered whether Millennials or Generation Z are shyer? A new scientific study provides an answer.

growing up shy essay

Do you find mingling and small talk challenging? Do what my 5-year-old does and just say some things. Here are five lessons for braver, bolder interactions.

growing up shy essay

Overcoming shyness often requires a long-term plan of transformative change. Here's how to get started.

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growing up shy essay

10 Personal Statement Essay Examples That Worked

What’s covered:, what is a personal statement.

  • Essay 1: Summer Program
  • Essay 2: Being Bangladeshi-American
  • Essay 3: Why Medicine
  • Essay 4: Love of Writing
  • Essay 5: Starting a Fire
  • Essay 6: Dedicating a Track
  • Essay 7: Body Image and Eating Disorders
  • Essay 8: Becoming a Coach
  • Essay 9: Eritrea
  • Essay 10: Journaling
  • Is Your Personal Statement Strong Enough?

Your personal statement is any essay that you must write for your main application, such as the Common App Essay , University of California Essays , or Coalition Application Essay . This type of essay focuses on your unique experiences, ideas, or beliefs that may not be discussed throughout the rest of your application. This essay should be an opportunity for the admissions officers to get to know you better and give them a glimpse into who you really are.

In this post, we will share 10 different personal statements that were all written by real students. We will also provide commentary on what each essay did well and where there is room for improvement, so you can make your personal statement as strong as possible!

Please note: Looking at examples of real essays students have submitted to colleges can be very beneficial to get inspiration for your essays. You should never copy or plagiarize from these examples when writing your own essays. Colleges can tell when an essay isn’t genuine and will not view students favorably if they plagiarized. 

Personal Statement Examples

Essay example #1: exchange program.

The twisting roads, ornate mosaics, and fragrant scent of freshly ground spices had been so foreign at first. Now in my fifth week of the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco, I felt more comfortable in the city. With a bag full of pastries from the market, I navigated to a bus stop, paid the fare, and began the trip back to my host family’s house. It was hard to believe that only a few years earlier my mom was worried about letting me travel around my home city on my own, let alone a place that I had only lived in for a few weeks. While I had been on a journey towards self-sufficiency and independence for a few years now, it was Morocco that pushed me to become the confident, self-reflective person that I am today.

As a child, my parents pressured me to achieve perfect grades, master my swim strokes, and discover interesting hobbies like playing the oboe and learning to pick locks. I felt compelled to live my life according to their wishes. Of course, this pressure was not a wholly negative factor in my life –– you might even call it support. However, the constant presence of my parents’ hopes for me overcame my own sense of desire and led me to become quite dependent on them. I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school. Despite all these achievements, I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success. I had always been expected to succeed on the path they had defined. However, this path was interrupted seven years after my parents’ divorce when my dad moved across the country to Oregon.

I missed my dad’s close presence, but I loved my new sense of freedom. My parents’ separation allowed me the space to explore my own strengths and interests as each of them became individually busier. As early as middle school, I was riding the light rail train by myself, reading maps to get myself home, and applying to special academic programs without urging from my parents. Even as I took more initiatives on my own, my parents both continued to see me as somewhat immature. All of that changed three years ago, when I applied and was accepted to the SNYI-L summer exchange program in Morocco. I would be studying Arabic and learning my way around the city of Marrakesh. Although I think my parents were a little surprised when I told them my news, the addition of a fully-funded scholarship convinced them to let me go.

I lived with a host family in Marrakesh and learned that they, too, had high expectations for me. I didn’t know a word of Arabic, and although my host parents and one brother spoke good English, they knew I was there to learn. If I messed up, they patiently corrected me but refused to let me fall into the easy pattern of speaking English just as I did at home. Just as I had when I was younger, I felt pressured and stressed about meeting their expectations. However, one day, as I strolled through the bustling market square after successfully bargaining with one of the street vendors, I realized my mistake. My host family wasn’t being unfair by making me fumble through Arabic. I had applied for this trip, and I had committed to the intensive language study. My host family’s rules about speaking Arabic at home had not been to fulfill their expectations for me, but to help me fulfill my expectations for myself. Similarly, the pressure my parents had put on me as a child had come out of love and their hopes for me, not out of a desire to crush my individuality.

As my bus drove through the still-bustling market square and past the medieval Ben-Youssef madrasa, I realized that becoming independent was a process, not an event. I thought that my parents’ separation when I was ten had been the one experience that would transform me into a self-motivated and autonomous person. It did, but that didn’t mean that I didn’t still have room to grow. Now, although I am even more self-sufficient than I was three years ago, I try to approach every experience with the expectation that it will change me. It’s still difficult, but I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important.

What the Essay Did Well

This is a nice essay because it delves into particular character trait of the student and how it has been shaped and matured over time. Although it doesn’t focus the essay around a specific anecdote, the essay is still successful because it is centered around this student’s independence. This is a nice approach for a personal statement: highlight a particular trait of yours and explore how it has grown with you.

The ideas in this essay are universal to growing up—living up to parents’ expectations, yearning for freedom, and coming to terms with reality—but it feels unique to the student because of the inclusion of details specific to them. Including their oboe lessons, the experience of riding the light rail by themselves, and the negotiations with a street vendor helps show the reader what these common tropes of growing up looked like for them personally. 

Another strength of the essay is the level of self-reflection included throughout the piece. Since there is no central anecdote tying everything together, an essay about a character trait is only successful when you deeply reflect on how you felt, where you made mistakes, and how that trait impacts your life. The author includes reflection in sentences like “ I felt like I had no sense of self beyond my drive for success, ” and “ I understand that just because growth can be uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not important. ” These sentences help us see how the student was impacted and what their point of view is.

What Could Be Improved

The largest change this essay would benefit from is to show not tell. The platitude you have heard a million times no doubt, but for good reason. This essay heavily relies on telling the reader what occurred, making us less engaged as the entire reading experience feels more passive. If the student had shown us what happens though, it keeps the reader tied to the action and makes them feel like they are there with the student, making it much more enjoyable to read. 

For example, they tell us about the pressure to succeed their parents placed on them: “ I pushed myself to get straight A’s, complied with years of oboe lessons, and dutifully attended hours of swim practice after school.”  They could have shown us what that pressure looked like with a sentence like this: “ My stomach turned somersaults as my rattling knee thumped against the desk before every test, scared to get anything less than a 95. For five years the painful squawk of the oboe only reminded me of my parents’ claps and whistles at my concerts. I mastered the butterfly, backstroke, and freestyle, fighting against the anchor of their expectations threatening to pull me down.”

If the student had gone through their essay and applied this exercise of bringing more detail and colorful language to sentences that tell the reader what happened, the essay would be really great. 

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Essay Example #2: Being Bangladeshi-American

Life before was good: verdant forests, sumptuous curries, and a devoted family.

Then, my family abandoned our comfortable life in Bangladesh for a chance at the American dream in Los Angeles. Within our first year, my father was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. He lost his battle three weeks before my sixth birthday. Facing a new country without the steady presence of my father, we were vulnerable — prisoners of hardship in the land of the free. We resettled in the Bronx, in my uncle’s renovated basement. It was meant to be our refuge, but I felt more displaced than ever. Gone were the high-rise condos of West L.A.; instead, government projects towered over the neighborhood. Pedestrians no longer smiled and greeted me; the atmosphere was hostile, even toxic. Schoolkids were quick to pick on those they saw as weak or foreign, hurling harsh words I’d never heard before.

Meanwhile, my family began integrating into the local Bangladeshi community. I struggled to understand those who shared my heritage. Bangladeshi mothers stayed home while fathers drove cabs and sold fruit by the roadside — painful societal positions. Riding on crosstown buses or walking home from school, I began to internalize these disparities. During my fleeting encounters with affluent Upper East Siders, I saw kids my age with nannies, parents who wore suits to work, and luxurious apartments with spectacular views. Most took cabs to their destinations: cabs that Bangladeshis drove. I watched the mundane moments of their lives with longing, aching to plant myself in their shoes. Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

As I grappled with my relationship with the Bangladeshi community, I turned my attention to helping my Bronx community by pursuing an internship with Assemblyman Luis Sepulveda. I handled desk work and took calls, spending the bulk of my time actively listening to the hardships constituents faced — everything from a veteran stripped of his benefits to a grandmother unable to support her bedridden grandchild.

I’d never exposed myself to stories like these, and now I was the first to hear them. As an intern, I could only assist in what felt like the small ways — pointing out local job offerings, printing information on free ESL classes, reaching out to non-profits. But to a community facing an onslaught of intense struggles, I realized that something as small as these actions could have vast impacts. Seeing the immediate consequences of my actions inspired me. Throughout that summer, I internalized my community’s daily challenges in a new light. I began to stop seeing the prevalent underemployment and cramped living quarters less as sources of shame. Instead, I saw them as realities that had to be acknowledged, but could ultimately be remedied. I also realized the benefits of the Bangladeshi culture I had been so ashamed of. My Bangla language skills were an asset to the office, and my understanding of Bangladeshi etiquette allowed for smooth communication between office staff and its constituents. As I helped my neighbors navigate city services, I saw my heritage with pride — a perspective I never expected to have.

I can now appreciate the value of my unique culture and background, and of living with less. This perspective offers room for progress, community integration, and a future worth fighting for. My time with Assemblyman Sepulveda’s office taught me that I can be a change agent in enabling this progression. Far from being ashamed of my community, I want to someday return to local politics in the Bronx to continue helping others access the American Dream. I hope to help my community appreciate the opportunity to make progress together. By embracing reality, I learned to live it. Along the way, I discovered one thing: life is good, but we can make it better.

This student’s passion for social justice and civic duty shines through in this essay because of how honest it is. Sharing their personal experience with immigrating, moving around, being an outsider, and finding a community allows us to see the hardships this student has faced and builds empathy towards their situation. However, what really makes it strong is that they go beyond describing the difficulties they faced and explain the mental impact it had on them as a child: Shame prickled down my spine. I distanced myself from my heritage, rejecting the traditional panjabis worn on Eid and refusing the torkari we ate for dinner every day. 

The rejection of their culture presented at the beginning of the essay creates a nice juxtaposition with the student’s view in the latter half of the essay and helps demonstrate how they have matured. They use their experience interning as a way to delve into a change in their thought process about their culture and show how their passion for social justice began. Using this experience as a mechanism to explore their thoughts and feelings is an excellent example of how items that are included elsewhere on your application should be incorporated into your essay.

This essay prioritizes emotions and personal views over specific anecdotes. Although there are details and certain moments incorporated throughout to emphasize the author’s points, the main focus remains on the student and how they grapple with their culture and identity.  

One area for improvement is the conclusion. Although the forward-looking approach is a nice way to end an essay focused on social justice, it would be nice to include more details and imagery in the conclusion. How does the student want to help their community? What government position do they see themselves holding one day? 

A more impactful ending might look like the student walking into their office at the New York City Housing Authority in 15 years and looking at the plans to build a new development in the Bronx just blocks away from where the grew up that would provide quality housing to people in their Bangladeshi community. They would smile while thinking about how far they have come from that young kid who used to be ashamed of their culture. 

Essay Example #3: Why Medicine

I took my first trip to China to visit my cousin Anna in July of 2014. Distance had kept us apart, but when we were together, we fell into all of our old inside jokes and caught up on each other’s lives. Her sparkling personality and optimistic attitude always brought a smile to my face. This time, however, my heart broke when I saw the effects of her brain cancer; she had suffered from a stroke that paralyzed her left side. She was still herself in many ways, but I could see that the damage to her brain made things difficult for her. I stayed by her every day, providing the support she needed, whether assisting her with eating and drinking, reading to her, or just watching “Friends.” During my flight back home, sorrow and helplessness overwhelmed me. Would I ever see Anna again? Could I have done more to make Anna comfortable? I wished I could stay in China longer to care for her. As I deplaned, I wondered if I could transform my grief to help other children and teenagers in the US who suffered as Anna did.

The day after I got home, as jet lag dragged me awake a few minutes after midnight, I remembered hearing about the Family Reach Foundation (FRF) and its work with children going through treatments at the local hospital and their families. I began volunteering in the FRF’s Children’s Activity Room, where I play with children battling cancer. Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up. When they take on the roles of firefighters or fairies, we all get caught up in the game; for that time, they forget the sanitized, stark, impersonal walls of the pediatric oncology ward. Building close relationships with them and seeing them giggle and laugh is so rewarding — I love watching them grow and get better throughout their course of treatment.

Hearing from the parents about their children’s condition and seeing the children recover inspired me to consider medical research. To get started, I enrolled in a summer collegelevel course in Abnormal Psychology. There I worked with Catelyn, a rising college senior, on a data analysis project regarding Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID). Together, we examined the neurological etiology of DID by studying four fMRI and PET cases. I fell in love with gathering data and analyzing the results and was amazed by our final product: several stunning brain images showcasing the areas of hyper and hypoactivity in brains affected by DID. Desire quickly followed my amazement — I want to continue this project and study more brains. Their complexity, delicacy, and importance to every aspect of life fascinate me. Successfully completing this research project gave me a sense of hope; I know I am capable of participating in a large scale research project and potentially making a difference in someone else’s life through my research.

Anna’s diagnosis inspired me to begin volunteering at FRF; from there, I discovered my desire to help people further by contributing to medical research. As my research interest blossomed, I realized that it’s no coincidence that I want to study brains—after all, Anna suffered from brain cancer. Reflecting on these experiences this past year and a half, I see that everything I’ve done is connected. Sadly, a few months after I returned from China, Anna passed away. I am still sad, but as I run a toy truck across the floor and watch one of the little patients’ eyes light up, I imagine that she would be proud of my commitment to pursue medicine and study the brain.

This essay has a very strong emotional core that tugs at the heart strings and makes the reader feel invested. Writing about sickness can be difficult and doesn’t always belong in a personal statement, but in this case it works well because the focus is on how this student cared for her cousin and dealt with the grief and emotions surrounding her condition. Writing about the compassion she showed and the doubts and concerns that filled her mind keeps the focus on the author and her personality. 

This continues when she again discusses the activities she did with the kids at FRF and the personal reflection this experience allowed her to have. For example, she writes: Volunteering has both made me appreciate my own health and also cherish the new relationships I build with the children and families. We play sports, make figures out of playdoh, and dress up.

Concluding the essay with the sad story of her cousin’s passing brings the essay full circle and returns to the emotional heart of the piece to once again build a connection with the reader. However, it finishes on a hopeful note and demonstrates how this student has been able to turn a tragic experience into a source of lifelong inspiration. 

One thing this essay should be cognizant of is that personal statements should not read as summaries of your extracurricular resume. Although this essay doesn’t fully fall into that trap, it does describe two key extracurriculars the student participated in. However, the inclusion of such a strong emotional core running throughout the essay helps keep the focus on the student and her thoughts and feelings during these activities.

To avoid making this mistake, make sure you have a common thread running through your essay and the extracurriculars provide support to the story you are trying to tell, rather than crafting a story around your activities. And, as this essay does, make sure there is lots of personal reflection and feelings weaved throughout to focus attention to you rather than your extracurriculars. 

Essay Example #4: Love of Writing

“I want to be a writer.” This had been my answer to every youthful discussion with the adults in my life about what I would do when I grew up. As early as elementary school, I remember reading my writing pieces aloud to an audience at “Author of the Month” ceremonies. Bearing this goal in mind, and hoping to gain some valuable experience, I signed up for a journalism class during my freshman year. Despite my love for writing, I initially found myself uninterested in the subject and I struggled to enjoy the class. When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines. Journalism required a laconic style and orderly structure, and I found my teacher’s assignments formulaic and dull. That class shook my confidence as a writer. I was uncertain if I should continue in it for the rest of my high school career.

Despite my misgivings, I decided that I couldn’t make a final decision on whether to quit journalism until I had some experience working for a paper outside of the classroom. The following year, I applied to be a staff reporter on our school newspaper. I hoped this would help me become more self-driven and creative, rather than merely writing articles that my teacher assigned. To my surprise, my time on staff was worlds away from what I experienced in the journalism class. Although I was unaccustomed to working in a fast-paced environment and initially found it burdensome to research and complete high-quality stories in a relatively short amount of time, I also found it exciting. I enjoyed learning more about topics and events on campus that I did not know much about; some of my stories that I covered in my first semester concerned a chess tournament, a food drive, and a Spanish immersion party. I relished in the freedom I had to explore and learn, and to write more independently than I could in a classroom.

Although I enjoyed many aspects of working for the paper immediately, reporting also pushed me outside of my comfort zone. I am a shy person, and speaking with people I did not know intimidated me. During my first interview, I met with the basketball coach to prepare for a story about the team’s winning streak. As I approached his office, I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block, and I could hardly get out my opening questions. Fortunately, the coach was very kind and helped me through the conversation. Encouraged, I prepared for my next interview with more confidence. After a few weeks of practice, I even started to look forward to interviewing people on campus. That first journalism class may have bored me, but even if journalism in practice was challenging, it was anything but tedious.

Over the course of that year, I grew to love writing for our school newspaper. Reporting made me aware of my surroundings, and made me want to know more about current events on campus and in the town where I grew up. By interacting with people all over campus, I came to understand the breadth of individuals and communities that make up my high school. I felt far more connected to diverse parts of my school through my work as a journalist, and I realized that journalism gave me a window into seeing beyond my own experiences. The style of news writing may be different from what I used to think “writing” meant, but I learned that I can still derive exciting plots from events that may have gone unnoticed if not for my stories. I no longer struggle to approach others, and truly enjoy getting to know people and recognizing their accomplishments through my writing. Becoming a writer may be a difficult path, but it is as rewarding as I hoped when I was young.

This essay is clearly structured in a manner that makes it flow very nicely and contributes to its success. It starts with a quote to draw in the reader and show this student’s life-long passion for writing. Then it addresses the challenges of facing new, unfamiliar territory and how this student overcame it. Finally, it concludes by reflecting on this eye-opening experience and a nod to their younger self from the introduction. Having a well-thought out and sequential structure with clear transitions makes it extremely easy for the reader to follow along and take away the main idea.

Another positive aspect of the essay is the use of strong and expressive language. Sentences like “ When I thought of writing, I imagined lyrical prose, profound poetry, and thrilling plot lines ” stand out because of the intentional use of words like “lyrical”, “profound”, and “thrilling” to convey the student’s love of writing. The author also uses an active voice to capture the readers’ attention and keep us engaged. They rely on their language and diction to reveal details to the reader, for instance saying “ I felt everything from my toes to my tongue freeze into a solid block ” to describe feeling nervous.

This essay is already very strong, so there isn’t much that needs to be changed. One thing that could take the essay from great to outstanding would be to throw in more quotes, internal dialogue, and sensory descriptors.

It would be nice to see the nerves they felt interviewing the coach by including dialogue like “ Um…I want to interview you about…uh…”.  They could have shown their original distaste for journalism by narrating the thoughts running through their head. The fast-paced environment of their newspaper could have come to life with descriptions about the clacking of keyboards and the whirl of people running around laying out articles.

Essay Example #5: Starting a Fire

Was I no longer the beloved daughter of nature, whisperer of trees? Knee-high rubber boots, camouflage, bug spray—I wore the garb and perfume of a proud wild woman, yet there I was, hunched over the pathetic pile of stubborn sticks, utterly stumped, on the verge of tears. As a child, I had considered myself a kind of rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees, who could glide through tick-infested meadows and emerge Lyme-free. I knew the cracks of the earth like the scars on my own rough palms. Yet here I was, ten years later, incapable of performing the most fundamental outdoor task: I could not, for the life of me, start a fire. 

Furiously I rubbed the twigs together—rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers. No smoke. The twigs were too young, too sticky-green; I tossed them away with a shower of curses, and began tearing through the underbrush in search of a more flammable collection. My efforts were fruitless. Livid, I bit a rejected twig, determined to prove that the forest had spurned me, offering only young, wet bones that would never burn. But the wood cracked like carrots between my teeth—old, brittle, and bitter. Roaring and nursing my aching palms, I retreated to the tent, where I sulked and awaited the jeers of my family. 

Rattling their empty worm cans and reeking of fat fish, my brother and cousins swaggered into the campsite. Immediately, they noticed the minor stick massacre by the fire pit and called to me, their deep voices already sharp with contempt. 

“Where’s the fire, Princess Clara?” they taunted. “Having some trouble?” They prodded me with the ends of the chewed branches and, with a few effortless scrapes of wood on rock, sparked a red and roaring flame. My face burned long after I left the fire pit. The camp stank of salmon and shame. 

In the tent, I pondered my failure. Was I so dainty? Was I that incapable? I thought of my hands, how calloused and capable they had been, how tender and smooth they had become. It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive. And I’d gotten glasses, having grown horrifically nearsighted; long nights of dim lighting and thick books had done this. I couldn’t remember the last time I had lain down on a hill, barefaced, and seen the stars without having to squint. Crawling along the edge of the tent, a spider confirmed my transformation—he disgusted me, and I felt an overwhelming urge to squash him. 

Yet, I realized I hadn’t really changed—I had only shifted perspective. I still eagerly explored new worlds, but through poems and prose rather than pastures and puddles. I’d grown to prefer the boom of a bass over that of a bullfrog, learned to coax a different kind of fire from wood, having developed a burn for writing rhymes and scrawling hypotheses. 

That night, I stayed up late with my journal and wrote about the spider I had decided not to kill. I had tolerated him just barely, only shrieking when he jumped—it helped to watch him decorate the corners of the tent with his delicate webs, knowing that he couldn’t start fires, either. When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.

This student is an excellent writer, which allows a simple story to be outstandingly compelling. The author articulates her points beautifully and creatively through her immense use of details and figurative language. Lines like “a rustic princess, a cradler of spiders and centipedes, who was serenaded by mourning doves and chickadees,” and “rubbed and rubbed until shreds of skin flaked from my fingers,” create vivid images that draw the reader in. 

The flowery and descriptive prose also contributes to the nice juxtaposition between the old Clara and the new Clara. The latter half of the essay contrasts elements of nature with music and writing to demonstrate how natural these interests are for her now. This sentence perfectly encapsulates the contrast she is trying to build: “It had been years since I’d kneaded mud between my fingers; instead of scaling a white pine, I’d practiced scales on my piano, my hands softening into those of a musician—fleshy and sensitive.”

In addition to being well-written, this essay is thematically cohesive. It begins with the simple introduction “Fire!” and ends with the following image: “When the night grew cold and the embers died, my words still smoked—my hands burned from all that scrawling—and even when I fell asleep, the ideas kept sparking—I was on fire, always on fire.” This full-circle approach leaves readers satisfied and impressed.

There is very little this essay should change, however one thing to be cautious about is having an essay that is overly-descriptive. We know from the essay that this student likes to read and write, and depending on other elements of her application, it might make total sense to have such a flowery and ornate writing style. However, your personal statement needs to reflect your voice as well as your personality. If you would never use language like this in conversation or your writing, don’t put it in your personal statement. Make sure there is a balance between eloquence and your personal voice.

Essay Example #6: Dedicating a Track

“Getting beat is one thing – it’s part of competing – but I want no part in losing.” Coach Rob Stark’s motto never fails to remind me of his encouragement on early-morning bus rides to track meets around the state. I’ve always appreciated the phrase, but an experience last June helped me understand its more profound, universal meaning.

Stark, as we affectionately call him, has coached track at my high school for 25 years. His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running. When I learned a neighboring high school had dedicated their track to a longtime coach, I felt that Stark deserved similar honors.

Our school district’s board of education indicated they would only dedicate our track to Stark if I could demonstrate that he was extraordinary. I took charge and mobilized my teammates to distribute petitions, reach out to alumni, and compile statistics on the many team and individual champions Stark had coached over the years. We received astounding support, collecting almost 3,000 signatures and pages of endorsements from across the community. With help from my teammates, I presented this evidence to the board.

They didn’t bite. 

Most members argued that dedicating the track was a low priority. Knowing that we had to act quickly to convince them of its importance, I called a team meeting where we drafted a rebuttal for the next board meeting. To my surprise, they chose me to deliver it. I was far from the best public speaker in the group, and I felt nervous about going before the unsympathetic board again. However, at that second meeting, I discovered that I enjoy articulating and arguing for something that I’m passionate about.

Public speaking resembles a cross country race. Walking to the starting line, you have to trust your training and quell your last minute doubts. When the gun fires, you can’t think too hard about anything; your performance has to be instinctual, natural, even relaxed. At the next board meeting, the podium was my starting line. As I walked up to it, familiar butterflies fluttered in my stomach. Instead of the track stretching out in front of me, I faced the vast audience of teachers, board members, and my teammates. I felt my adrenaline build, and reassured myself: I’ve put in the work, my argument is powerful and sound. As the board president told me to introduce myself, I heard, “runners set” in the back of my mind. She finished speaking, and Bang! The brief silence was the gunshot for me to begin. 

The next few minutes blurred together, but when the dust settled, I knew from the board members’ expressions and the audience’s thunderous approval that I had run quite a race. Unfortunately, it wasn’t enough; the board voted down our proposal. I was disappointed, but proud of myself, my team, and our collaboration off the track. We stood up for a cause we believed in, and I overcame my worries about being a leader. Although I discovered that changing the status quo through an elected body can be a painstakingly difficult process and requires perseverance, I learned that I enjoy the challenges this effort offers. Last month, one of the school board members joked that I had become a “regular” – I now often show up to meetings to advocate for a variety of causes, including better environmental practices in cafeterias and safer equipment for athletes.

Just as Stark taught me, I worked passionately to achieve my goal. I may have been beaten when I appealed to the board, but I certainly didn’t lose, and that would have made Stark proud.

This essay effectively conveys this student’s compassion for others, initiative, and determination—all great qualities to exemplify in a personal statement!

Although they rely on telling us a lot of what happened up until the board meeting, the use of running a race (their passion) as a metaphor for public speaking provides a lot of insight into the fear that this student overcame to work towards something bigger than themself. Comparing a podium to the starting line, the audience to the track, and silence to the gunshot is a nice way of demonstrating this student’s passion for cross country running without making that the focus of the story.

The essay does a nice job of coming full circle at the end by explaining what the quote from the beginning meant to them after this experience. Without explicitly saying “ I now know that what Stark actually meant is…” they rely on the strength of their argument above to make it obvious to the reader what it means to get beat but not lose. 

One of the biggest areas of improvement in the intro, however, is how the essay tells us Stark’s impact rather than showing us: His care, dedication, and emphasis on developing good character has left an enduring impact on me and hundreds of other students. Not only did he help me discover my talent and love for running, but he also taught me the importance of commitment and discipline and to approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

The writer could’ve helped us feel a stronger emotional connection to Stark if they had included examples of Stark’s qualities, rather than explicitly stating them. For example, they could’ve written something like: Stark was the kind of person who would give you gas money if you told him your parents couldn’t afford to pick you up from practice. And he actually did that—several times. At track meets, alumni regularly would come talk to him and tell him how he’d changed their lives. Before Stark, I was ambivalent about running and was on the JV team, but his encouragement motivated me to run longer and harder and eventually make varsity. Because of him, I approach every endeavor with the passion and intensity that I bring to running.

Essay Example #7: Body Image and Eating Disorders

I press the “discover” button on my Instagram app, hoping to find enticing pictures to satisfy my boredom. Scrolling through, I see funny videos and mouth-watering pictures of food. However, one image stops me immediately. A fit teenage girl with a “perfect body” relaxes in a bikini on a beach. Beneath it, I see a slew of flattering comments. I shake with disapproval over the image’s unrealistic quality. However, part of me still wants to have a body like hers so that others will make similar comments to me.

I would like to resolve a silent issue that harms many teenagers and adults: negative self image and low self-esteem in a world where social media shapes how people view each other. When people see the façades others wear to create an “ideal” image, they can develop poor thought patterns rooted in negative self-talk. The constant comparisons to “perfect” others make people feel small. In this new digital age, it is hard to distinguish authentic from artificial representations.

When I was 11, I developed anorexia nervosa. Though I was already thin, I wanted to be skinny like the models that I saw on the magazine covers on the grocery store stands. Little did I know that those models probably also suffered from disorders, and that photoshop erased their flaws. I preferred being underweight to being healthy. No matter how little I ate or how thin I was, I always thought that I was too fat. I became obsessed with the number on the scale and would try to eat the least that I could without my parents urging me to take more. Fortunately, I stopped engaging in anorexic behaviors before middle school. However, my underlying mental habits did not change. The images that had provoked my disorder in the first place were still a constant presence in my life.

By age 15, I was in recovery from anorexia, but suffered from depression. While I used to only compare myself to models, the growth of social media meant I also compared myself to my friends and acquaintances. I felt left out when I saw my friends’ excitement about lake trips they had taken without me. As I scrolled past endless photos of my flawless, thin classmates with hundreds of likes and affirming comments, I felt my jealousy spiral. I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.” When that didn’t work, I started to feel too anxious to post anything at all.  

Body image insecurities and social media comparisons affect thousands of people – men, women, children, and adults – every day. I am lucky – after a few months of my destructive social media habits, I came across a video that pointed out the illusory nature of social media; many Instagram posts only show off good things while people hide their flaws. I began going to therapy, and recovered from my depression. To address the problem of self-image and social media, we can all focus on what matters on the inside and not what is on the surface. As an effort to become healthy internally, I started a club at my school to promote clean eating and radiating beauty from within. It has helped me grow in my confidence, and today I’m not afraid to show others my struggles by sharing my experience with eating disorders. Someday, I hope to make this club a national organization to help teenagers and adults across the country. I support the idea of body positivity and embracing difference, not “perfection.” After all, how can we be ourselves if we all look the same?

This essay covers the difficult topics of eating disorders and mental health. If you’re thinking about covering similar topics in your essay, we recommend reading our post Should You Talk About Mental Health in College Essays?

The short answer is that, yes, you can talk about mental health, but it can be risky. If you do go that route, it’s important to focus on what you learned from the experience.

The strength of this essay is the student’s vulnerability, in excerpts such as this: I wanted to be admired and loved by other people too. However, I felt that I could never be enough. I began to hate the way that I looked, and felt nothing in my life was good enough. I wanted to be called “perfect” and “body goals,” so I tried to only post at certain times of day to maximize my “likes.”

The student goes on to share how they recovered from their depression through an eye-opening video and therapy sessions, and they’re now helping others find their self-worth as well. It’s great that this essay looks towards the future and shares the writer’s goals of making their club a national organization; we can see their ambition and compassion.

The main weakness of this essay is that it doesn’t focus enough on their recovery process, which is arguably the most important part. They could’ve told us more about the video they watched or the process of starting their club and the interactions they’ve had with other members. Especially when sharing such a vulnerable topic, there should be vulnerability in the recovery process too. That way, the reader can fully appreciate all that this student has overcome.

Essay Example #8: Becoming a Coach

”Advanced females ages 13 to 14 please proceed to staging with your coaches at this time.” Skittering around the room, eyes wide and pleading, I frantically explained my situation to nearby coaches. The seconds ticked away in my head; every polite refusal increased my desperation.

Despair weighed me down. I sank to my knees as a stream of competitors, coaches, and officials flowed around me. My dojang had no coach, and the tournament rules prohibited me from competing without one.

Although I wanted to remain strong, doubts began to cloud my mind. I could not help wondering: what was the point of perfecting my skills if I would never even compete? The other members of my team, who had found coaches minutes earlier, attempted to comfort me, but I barely heard their words. They couldn’t understand my despair at being left on the outside, and I never wanted them to understand.

Since my first lesson 12 years ago, the members of my dojang have become family. I have watched them grow up, finding my own happiness in theirs. Together, we have honed our kicks, blocks, and strikes. We have pushed one another to aim higher and become better martial artists. Although my dojang had searched for a reliable coach for years, we had not found one. When we attended competitions in the past, my teammates and I had always gotten lucky and found a sympathetic coach. Now, I knew this practice was unsustainable. It would devastate me to see the other members of my dojang in my situation, unable to compete and losing hope as a result. My dojang needed a coach, and I decided it was up to me to find one.

I first approached the adults in the dojang – both instructors and members’ parents. However, these attempts only reacquainted me with polite refusals. Everyone I asked told me they couldn’t devote multiple weekends per year to competitions. I soon realized that I would have become the coach myself.

At first, the inner workings of tournaments were a mystery to me. To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side. I learned everything from motivational strategies to technical, behind-the-scenes components of Taekwondo competitions. Though I emerged with new knowledge and confidence in my capabilities, others did not share this faith.

Parents threw me disbelieving looks when they learned that their children’s coach was only a child herself. My self-confidence was my armor, deflecting their surly glances. Every armor is penetrable, however, and as the relentless barrage of doubts pounded my resilience, it began to wear down. I grew unsure of my own abilities.

Despite the attack, I refused to give up. When I saw the shining eyes of the youngest students preparing for their first competition, I knew I couldn’t let them down. To quit would be to set them up to be barred from competing like I was. The knowledge that I could solve my dojang’s longtime problem motivated me to overcome my apprehension.

Now that my dojang flourishes at competitions, the attacks on me have weakened, but not ended. I may never win the approval of every parent; at times, I am still tormented by doubts, but I find solace in the fact that members of my dojang now only worry about competing to the best of their abilities.

Now, as I arrive at a tournament with my students, I close my eyes and remember the past. I visualize the frantic search for a coach and the chaos amongst my teammates as we competed with one another to find coaches before the staging calls for our respective divisions. I open my eyes to the exact opposite scene. Lacking a coach hurt my ability to compete, but I am proud to know that no member of my dojang will have to face that problem again.

This essay begins with an in-the-moment narrative that really illustrates the chaos of looking for a coach last-minute. We feel the writer’s emotions, particularly her dejectedness, at not being able to compete. Starting an essay in media res  is a great way to capture the attention of your readers and build anticipation for what comes next.

Through this essay, we can see how gutsy and determined the student is in deciding to become a coach themselves. She shows us these characteristics through their actions, rather than explicitly telling us: To prepare myself for success as a coach, I spent the next year as an official and took coaching classes on the side.  Also, by discussing the opposition she faced and how it affected her, the student is open and vulnerable about the reality of the situation.

The essay comes full circle as the author recalls the frantic situations in seeking out a coach, but this is no longer a concern for them and their team. Overall, this essay is extremely effective in painting this student as mature, bold, and compassionate.

The biggest thing this essay needs to work on is showing not telling. Throughout the essay, the student tells us that she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence,” she “grew unsure of her own abilities,” and she “refused to give up”. What we really want to know is what this looks like.

Instead of saying she “emerged with new knowledge and confidence” she should have shared how she taught a new move to a fellow team-member without hesitation. Rather than telling us she “grew unsure of her own abilities” she should have shown what that looked like by including her internal dialogue and rhetorical questions that ran through her mind. She could have demonstrated what “refusing to give up” looks like by explaining how she kept learning coaching techniques on her own, turned to a mentor for advice, or devised a plan to win over the trust of parents. 

Essay Example #9: Eritrea

No one knows where Eritrea is.

On the first day of school, for the past nine years, I would pensively stand in front of a class, a teacher, a stranger  waiting for the inevitable question: Where are you from?

I smile politely, my dimples accentuating my ambiguous features. “Eritrea,” I answer promptly and proudly. But I  am always prepared. Before their expression can deepen into confusion, ready to ask “where is that,” I elaborate,  perhaps with a fleeting hint of exasperation, “East Africa, near Ethiopia.”

Sometimes, I single out the key-shaped hermit nation on a map, stunning teachers who have “never had a student  from there!” Grinning, I resist the urge to remark, “You didn’t even know it existed until two minutes ago!”

Eritrea is to the East of Ethiopia, its arid coastline clutches the lucrative Red Sea. Battle scars litter the ancient  streets – the colonial Italian architecture lathered with bullet holes, the mosques mangled with mortar shells.  Originally part of the world’s first Christian kingdom, Eritrea passed through the hands of colonial Italy, Britain, and  Ethiopia for over a century, until a bloody thirty year war of Independence liberated us.

But these are facts that anyone can know with a quick Google search. These are facts that I have memorised and compounded, first from my Grandmother and now from pristine books  borrowed from the library.

No historical narrative, however, can adequately capture what Eritrea is.  No one knows the aroma of bushels of potatoes, tomatoes, and garlic – still covered in dirt – that leads you to the open-air market. No one knows the poignant scent of spices, arranged in orange piles reminiscent of compacted  dunes.  No one knows how to haggle stubborn herders for sheep and roosters for Christmas celebrations as deliberately as my mother. No one can replicate the perfect balance of spices in dorho and tsebhi as well as my grandmother,  her gnarly hands stirring the pot with ancient precision (chastising my clumsy knife work with the potatoes).  It’s impossible to learn when the injera is ready – the exact moment you have to lift the lid of the mogogo. Do it too  early (or too late) and the flatbread becomes mangled and gross. It is a sixth sense passed through matriarchal  lineages.

There are no sources that catalogue the scent of incense that wafts through the sunlit porch on St. Michael’s; no  films that can capture the luminescence of hundreds of flaming bonfires that fluoresce the sidewalks on Kudus  Yohannes, as excited children chant Ge’ez proverbs whose origin has been lost to time.  You cannot learn the familiarity of walking beneath the towering Gothic figure of the Enda Mariam Cathedral, the  crowds undulating to the ringing of the archaic bells.  I have memorized the sound of the rains hounding the metal roof during kiremti , the heat of the sun pounding  against the Toyota’s window as we sped down towards Ghinda , the opulent brilliance of the stars twinkling in a  sky untainted by light pollution, the scent of warm rolls of bani wafting through the streets at precisely 6 o’clock each day…

I fill my flimsy sketchbook with pictures from my memory. My hand remembers the shapes of the hibiscus drifting  in the wind, the outline of my grandmother (affectionately nicknamed a’abaye ) leaning over the garden, the bizarre architecture of the Fiat Tagliero .  I dice the vegetables with movements handed down from generations. My nose remembers the scent of frying garlic, the sourness of the warm tayta , the sharpness of the mit’mt’a …

This knowledge is intrinsic.  “I am Eritrean,” I repeat. “I am proud.”  Within me is an encyclopedia of history, culture, and idealism.

Eritrea is the coffee made from scratch, the spices drying in the sun, the priests and nuns. Eritrea is wise, filled with ambition, and unseen potential.  Eritrea isn’t a place, it’s an identity.

This is an exceptional essay that provides a window into this student’s culture that really makes their love for their country and heritage leap off the page. The sheer level of details and sensory descriptors this student is able to fit in this space makes the essay stand out. From the smells, to the traditions, sounds, and sights, the author encapsulates all the glory of Eritrea for the reader. 

The vivid images this student is able to create for the reader, whether it is having the tedious conversation with every teacher or cooking in their grandmother’s kitchen, transports us into the story and makes us feel like we are there in the moment with the student. This is a prime example of an essay that shows , not tells.

Besides the amazing imagery, the use of shorter paragraphs also contributes to how engaging this essay is. Employing this tactic helps break up the text to make it more readable and it isolates ideas so they stick out more than if they were enveloped in a large paragraph.

Overall, this is a really strong essay that brings to life this student’s heritage through its use of vivid imagery. This essay exemplifies what it means to show not tell in your writing, and it is a great example of how you can write an intimate personal statement without making yourself the primary focus of your essay. 

There is very little this essay should improve upon, but one thing the student might consider would be to inject more personal reflection into their response. Although we can clearly take away their deep love and passion for their homeland and culture, the essay would be a bit more personal if they included the emotions and feelings they associate with the various aspects of Eritrea. For example, the way their heart swells with pride when their grandmother praises their ability to cook a flatbread or the feeling of serenity when they hear the bells ring out from the cathedral. Including personal details as well as sensory ones would create a wonderful balance of imagery and reflection.

Essay Example #10: Journaling

Flipping past dozens of colorful entries in my journal, I arrive at the final blank sheet. I press my pen lightly to the page, barely scratching its surface to create a series of loops stringing together into sentences. Emotions spill out, and with their release, I feel lightness in my chest. The stream of thoughts slows as I reach the bottom of the page, and I gently close the cover of the worn book: another journal finished.

I add the journal to the stack of eleven books on my nightstand. Struck by the bittersweet sensation of closing a chapter of my life, I grab the notebook at the bottom of the pile to reminisce.

“I want to make a flying mushen to fly in space and your in it” – October 2008

Pulling back the cover of my first Tinkerbell-themed diary, the prompt “My Hopes and Dreams” captures my attention. Though “machine” is misspelled in my scribbled response, I see the beginnings of my past obsession with outer space. At the age of five, I tore through novels about the solar system, experimented with rockets built from plastic straws, and rented Space Shuttle films from Blockbuster to satisfy my curiosities. While I chased down answers to questions as limitless as the universe, I fell in love with learning. Eight journals later, the same relentless curiosity brought me to an airplane descending on San Francisco Bay.

“I wish I had infinite sunsets” – July 2019

I reach for the charcoal notepad near the top of the pile and open to the first page: my flight to the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes. While I was excited to explore bioengineering, anxiety twisted in my stomach as I imagined my destination, unsure of whether I could overcome my shyness and connect with others.

With each new conversation, the sweat on my palms became less noticeable, and I met students from 23 different countries. Many of the moments where I challenged myself socially revolved around the third story deck of the Jerry house. A strange medley of English, Arabic, and Mandarin filled the summer air as my friends and I gathered there every evening, and dialogues at sunset soon became moments of bliss. In our conversations about cultural differences, the possibility of an afterlife, and the plausibility of far-fetched conspiracy theories, I learned to voice my opinion. As I was introduced to different viewpoints, these moments challenged my understanding of the world around me. In my final entries from California, I find excitement to learn from others and increased confidence, a tool that would later allow me to impact my community.

“The beauty in a tower of cans” – June 2020

Returning my gaze to the stack of journals, I stretch to take the floral-patterned book sitting on top. I flip through, eventually finding the beginnings of the organization I created during the outbreak of COVID-19. Since then, Door-to-Door Deliveries has woven its way through my entries and into reality, allowing me to aid high-risk populations through free grocery delivery.

With the confidence I gained the summer before, I took action when seeing others in need rather than letting my shyness hold me back. I reached out to local churches and senior centers to spread word of our services and interacted with customers through our website and social media pages. To further expand our impact, we held two food drives, and I mustered the courage to ask for donations door-to-door. In a tower of canned donations, I saw the value of reaching out to help others and realized my own potential to impact the world around me.

I delicately close the journal in my hands, smiling softly as the memories reappear, one after another. Reaching under my bed, I pull out a fresh notebook and open to its first sheet. I lightly press my pen to the page, “And so begins the next chapter…”

The structuring of this essay makes it easy and enjoyable to read. The student effectively organizes their various life experiences around their tower of journals, which centers the reader and makes the different stories easy to follow. Additionally, the student engages quotes from their journals—and unique formatting of the quotes—to signal that they are moving in time and show us which memory we should follow them to.

Thematically, the student uses the idea of shyness to connect the different memories they draw out of their journals. As the student describes their experiences overcoming shyness at the Stanford Pre-Collegiate Summer Institutes and Door-to-Door Deliveries, this essay can be read as an Overcoming Obstacles essay.

At the end of this essay, readers are fully convinced that this student is dedicated (they have committed to journaling every day), thoughtful (journaling is a thoughtful process and, in the essay, the student reflects thoughtfully on the past), and motivated (they flew across the country for a summer program and started a business). These are definitely qualities admissions officers are looking for in applicants!

Although this essay is already exceptionally strong as it’s written, the first journal entry feels out of place compared to the other two entries that discuss the author’s shyness and determination. It works well for the essay to have an entry from when the student was younger to add some humor (with misspelled words) and nostalgia, but if the student had either connected the quote they chose to the idea of overcoming a fear present in the other two anecdotes or if they had picked a different quote all together related to their shyness, it would have made the entire essay feel more cohesive.

Where to Get Your Personal Statement Edited

Do you want feedback on your personal statement? After rereading your essays countless times, it can be difficult to evaluate your writing objectively. That’s why we created our free Peer Essay Review tool , where you can get a free review of your essay from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by reviewing other students’ essays. 

If you want a college admissions expert to review your essay, advisors on CollegeVine have helped students refine their writing and submit successful applications to top schools. Find the right advisor for you to improve your chances of getting into your dream school!

Next Step: Supplemental Essays

Essay Guides for Each School

How to Write a Stellar Extracurricular Activity College Essay

4 Tips for Writing a Diversity College Essay

How to Write the “Why This College” Essay

Related CollegeVine Blog Posts

growing up shy essay

The Marginalian

Maya Angelou on Home, Belonging, and (Not) Growing Up

By maria popova.

growing up shy essay

In the first essay, simply titled “Home,” Angelou offers this poignant lens on identity, growing up, and belonging.

Thomas Wolfe warned in the title of America’s great novel that ‘You Can’t Go Home Again.’ I enjoyed the book but I never agreed with the title. I believe that one can never leave home. I believe that one carries the shadows, the dreams, the fears and dragons of home under one’s skin, at the extreme corners of one’s eyes and possibly in the gristle of the earlobe. Home is that youthful region where a child is the only real living inhabitant. Parents, siblings, and neighbors, are mysterious apparitions, who come, go, and do strange unfathomable things in and around the child, the region’s only enfranchised citizen. […] I am convinced that most people do not grow up. We find parking spaces and honor our credit cards. We marry and dare to have children and call that growing up. I think what we do is mostly grow old. We carry accumulation of years in our bodies and on our faces, but generally our real selves, the children inside, are still innocent and shy as magnolias. We may act sophisticated and worldly but I believe we feel safest when we go inside ourselves and find home, a place where we belong and maybe the only place we really do.

growing up shy essay

Letter to My Daughter is a superb read in its entirety. Complement it with Angelou on freedom and courage in the face of evil .

— Published August 16, 2012 — https://www.themarginalian.org/2012/08/16/maya-angelou-letter-to-my-daughter-home/ —

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Stanford University

Being shy timothy wong, virtually all of stanford’s undergraduates live on campus. write a note to your future roommate that reveals something about you or that will help your roommate—and us—know you better..

As a young boy I was always shy. I didn’t have very many friends aside from my one best friend, Christophe. Though most kids considered me quiet, with my best friend, I was silly, fun loving, and even charismatic. Growing up in a community that is 94% white, being Asian instantly set me apart from the rest of the students. Being cast aside because of my race hurt me at first; however, over time, this feeling of distinctiveness gave me the drive to prove I was as good as everyone else. Because of this, I learned to push myself and to achieve my goals. Even as a young student in fourth grade, I worked hard on my math booklets and always finished before the rest of the kids. This made me realize that I actually didn’t want to be exactly like everyone else: I wanted to excel, and therefore I wanted to be different.

In sixth grade, I changed school districts and was forced to make new friends. I thought this would be a challenge; however, I began to see it as an opportunity to make a new impression on my peers. I made another best friend, Jake, who introduced me to many other friends. From Jake, I learned the social skills I lacked at my old school, and I could more easily interact with my classmates. Instead of being “the Asian kid,...

GradeSaver provides access to 2313 study guide PDFs and quizzes, 10989 literature essays, 2751 sample college application essays, 911 lesson plans, and ad-free surfing in this premium content, “Members Only” section of the site! Membership includes a 10% discount on all editing orders.

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growing up shy essay

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Essays About Growing Up: 5 Examples and 7 Prompts

Essays about growing up help us view and understand various experiences from different perspectives. Check out our top examples and prompts for your writing.

How do you know when you’ve finally grown up? Me, it happened when I was in high school. I realized I matured when I had no qualms about looking for ways to help my family financially. I didn’t think I had a choice, but at the same time, I desperately wanted to aid my parents in ensuring we had food on the table. 

I was a fast food crew member, a librarian, and many other odd jobs I could talk about for hours. Some judge my parents’ poor financial literacy when I tell my stories, but I never did. All of it was a part of my growing up; without these experiences, I wouldn’t be the person I am today. 

Growing up is a unique experience for every person, influenced by our surroundings and influences. With so many variables, each person has their own story about growing up; take a look below to see the best example and prompts to begin writing your own. You might also like these essays about youth .

5 Essay Examples

1. social influences on children’s growing up by anonymous on ivypanda.com, 2. growing up in the 626 by katie gee salisbury, 3. growing up in poverty determines the person’s fate by anonymous on gradesfixer.com, 4. growing up on the streets by writer bernadette, 5. growing up with hearing loss by anonymous on ivypanda.com, 1. what does growing up mean, 2. the effect of my environment on my growth, 3. growing up rich or poor, 4. family values and growing up, 5. growing up with siblings, 6. your best memories growing up, 7. changes while growing up.

“Human growth and development is a complicated process which is inevitably impacted upon by socioeconomic circumstances within which an individual is growing up.”

To demonstrate the social influences that can impact a child’s experiences growing up, the essay offers several credible citations from professionals, such as Damon and Lerner, the writer and editor of “ Handbook of Child Psychology .” It looks at how social factors, such as living conditions, access to resources, and others, can affect a child’s overall development as they grow. Ultimately, the writer believes that parents play a huge role in the development of their children. You can also check out these essays about development .

“Something welled up inside my throat. All of a sudden I felt a burning urgency to stake a claim, to assert that I was one of them, that I too belonged in this group. ‘Hey guys, I’m Chinese too,’ I ventured. A classmate who carpooled with my family was quick to counter, ‘Katie, that doesn’t count.'”

Salisbury shares her experiences as an overachieving Asian-American, focusing on her grievances at being biracial, not connecting to her heritage, and people’s assumption of her being white. She talks about her life in 626, the area code for Arcadia, Southern California, where most Asians reside. At the end of her essay, Salisbury offers facts about herself to the reader, recognizing and accepting every part of herself.

Looking for more? Check out these essays about time .

“Economic mobility is the ability of someone or a family to move up from one income group to another. In the United States, it is at an all-time low and is currently decreasing.”

The author shares their opinion on how a family’s financial situation shapes their children’s future. To back up their claim, the essay provides relevant statistics showing the number of children and families in poverty, alongside its dramatic effects on a child’s overall development. The writer mentions that a family’s economic incompetence can pass on to the children, reducing their chances of receiving a proper education.

“As a young black woman growing up on the hardcore streets of North Philadelphia, you have to strive and fight for everything. The negativity and madness can grab and swallow even the most well-behaved kids.”

Bernadette opens her readers’ eyes to the harsh realities of being a young black woman throughout her essay. However, she also expresses her gratitude to her family, who encouraged her to have a positive mindset. Her parents, who also grew up on the streets of North Philly, were determined to give her and her siblings a proper education. 

She knows how individuals’ environments impact their values ​​and choices, so she fought hard to endure her circumstances. She also notes that the lack of exposure to different social norms results in children having limited thinking and prevents them from entertaining new perspectives. You might be interested in these essays about dream jobs .

“The world is not accommodating to people with hearing disabilities: apart from professionals, barely anyone knows and understands sign language. On top of that, many are merely unaware of the fact that they might be hurting and making a deaf person feel disrespected.”

The essay discusses critical issues in children growing up with hearing impairments. It includes situations that show the difference between a child growing up in an all-deaf family and a non-deaf environment. While parental love and support are essential, deaf parents should consider hearing impairment a gift and be aware of their children’s needs. 

If you are interested in learning more, check out our essay writing tips !

7 Prompts for Essays About Growing Up

Growing up is a continuous sequence where we develop and experience significant changes in our bodies and how we think and feel. It’s the transition between being a child and an adult, so define what childhood and adulthood entail in your essay.

Then, describe how an individual grows up and the indications that they progressed physically and intellectually. For a fun addition to your essay, include questions your readers can answer to see if they have matured.

Essays About Growing Up: The effect of my environment on my growth

Many studies show how people’s environments, such as home, community, and school, affect growth. These environments significantly impact an individual’s development through interactions. For this prompt, write about the factors that influence your overall development and explain how you think they affected you. For example, those who studied at a religious school tend to be more conservative.

Money is essential for survival, but only some have easy access. Most people act and make decisions based on how much money they have, which also influences their behavior. In this prompt, cite several situations where money affects parents’ decisions about their children’s needs and wants and how it affects the children as they grow up.

Discuss how financial constraints impact their emotions, perceptions, and choices in life. Choose high, average, and low-income households, then compare and contrast their situations. To create an in-depth analysis, use interview research and statistical data to back up your arguments.

Studies show that children understand rules and have already formed their behaviors and attitudes at seven. Before this age, children are surrounded by relatives who teach them values through experiences within the family. For this prompt, use real-life examples and factual information to discuss the importance of good parenting in instilling good values ​​in children.

Essays About Growing Up: Growing up with siblings

Growing up with siblings is an entirely different experience growing up versus being an only child. Use this prompt to explain how having a brother or sister can impact a child’s progress and discuss its pros and cons. For instance, having siblings means the child has more role models and can get more emotional support. However, it can also mean that a child craves more of their parent’s attention. Discuss these points in your essay, and decide the “better” experience, for a fun argumentative essay.

In this essay, choose the best memories you had from childhood to the current day that has contributed significantly to your principles and outlook. Describe each memory and share how it changed you, for better or worse.

Talk about the changes people expect as they grow up. These physical, emotional, or mental changes lead people to act and think more maturely.  Add studies demonstrating the necessity of these changes and recount instances when you realize that you’ve grown up. For example, if before you didn’t care about your spending, now you’re more frugal and learned to save money. For help with your essay, check our round-up of best essay writing apps .

growing up shy essay

Maria Caballero is a freelance writer who has been writing since high school. She believes that to be a writer doesn't only refer to excellent syntax and semantics but also knowing how to weave words together to communicate to any reader effectively.

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Childhood and Growing up Essay: Titles & Examples

The picture introduces the main ideas of a growing up essay.

What are the challenges of growing up? This question is thought-provoking and exciting to answer. Each person has their unique experience, and for many the process of growing up is not easy. Some live in poverty, others have complex family relationships. A childhood and growing up essay allows you to discover your new sides and see how well you know yourself.

This article is a writing guide for an essay about growing up. It contains creative essay titles on the topic, together with writing prompts and short essay examples. Get inspired to write your growing up essay with us!

  • 📝 Growing up Writing Prompts
  • 📚 Growing up Essay Topics
  • 📜 Essay Sample #1
  • 📜 Essay Sample #2

📝 What Are the Challenges of Growing Up? Essay Prompts 

Every child is unique, so that everyone can tell a different childhood story.

What is typical for everyone – the process of growing up is a challenge. Although there’re lots of challenges, it’s also an exciting experience.

Growing up essays usually describe hobbies, relationships with siblings, difficulties with parents, etc. Check our essay ideas below.

The picture provides the list of the best themes for a growing up essay.

What Does It Mean to Grow up?

This is not only about aging or changing your looks. Growing up is a physical and a deep psychological process at the same time. Your picture of the world changes, people come and go, and you change too.

Creating a mind map of your childhood can help you understand what exactly growing up was to you.

A reflective childhood & growing up essay can involve such matters:

  • Taking on new responsibilities.
  • Learning from mistakes.
  • Changes in attitude towards people.
  • Childhood dreams and ambitions.
  • Childhood beliefs and values.
  • Independence, confidence, and self-acceptance.
  • Life lessons that shaped one’s personality.
  • People who affected the growing up process.

Growing up in a Small Town Essay

Describe the details of being a child in a small town. You can also describe the pluses and minuses of living in a small town. It can be a general overview, but better try to connect it to your life and experience.

In this kind of a growing up essay, you might write about:

  • Knowing everyone around.
  • Local school.
  • The first summer job.
  • The places that have always been special.

A comparative essay is a good choice in this case. Discuss why life in small towns is different from life in big cities.

Growing up without a Father Essay

How many children in the United States grow up in single-parent families?

Growing up with a single parent is certainly not the only thing that shapes a kid’s personality. However, it is one of the essential factors, for sure.

  • Check the statistics to see how many children grow up with one parent.
  • Tell about the mother’s efforts to raise children alone while working.
  • Include stories about relatives that were of immense help: siblings, aunts, uncles, and grandparents.
  • Describe a person who substitutes father and his role.

Growing up without a Mother Essay

This topic might seem similar to the previous one, but there are several differences.

  • Write about the general psychological effects of growing up without a mother.
  • Compare the scientific facts with personal experience and conclude.
  • Describe how it affects adult life and childhood.
  • Write about the typical leisure time with father.

While describing a relationship with a father, describe daily responsibilities and how they influence a child’s life. What challenges do children growing up with a single parent experience?

Growing up Asian in America Essay

Even though the US is multicultural, there are still issues that people of color face. Including children.

Explain how the childhood of an Asian is different from the experience of white Americans. Describe it if you were a part of an Asian community such as a neighborhood or school you attended. Write about your national traditions that you maintained or abandoned.

In your essay on growing up, describe the challenges you overcame. These might include:

  • The time you faced racism.
  • The stereotypes and misconceptions you faced.
  • The choice between your identity and the one imposed by society.
  • How has the social position of Asians in the United States changed?

Growing up in Poverty Essay

How many young Americans live in families with incomes below the poverty threshold? There are several risks which growing up in poverty possesses.

You can discuss them in your growing-up-poor essay:

  • Malnutrition. Starting from low birth weight, ending with health problems.
  • Psychological damage. Being in need as a child might cause emotional and behavioral issues.
  • Academic failures. Some poor children have to work and attend school at the same time. This interferes with the proper learning process.

Use growing up in poverty topic for a problem-solution essay. Here you can discuss how to deal with poverty and provide equal opportunities for all children.

Growing up in Two Cultures Essay

Adapting to a new culture is a complicated process. It is a massive challenge for children as they can’t identify themselves.

Here is what you can discuss in your essay on growing up:

  • Traditions of your family. They might include cuisine, holidays, religious practices.
  • Transcultural adaptation. Describe the change of behavioral patterns, language, or looks.
  • Your relationships with peers. Tell about the situations you remember: bad experiences such as bullying or good ones such as interest in your culture.

Write a narrative essay about your vision of what it’s like to be a person who belongs to two cultures.

📚 Essay Titles about Growing Up

And here is your selection of essay topics that you can also use as ideas for a speech or discussion.

You can pick your essay title from this list:

  • What country is the best for children to grow up in?
  • Should kids and teenagers work during the summer holidays?
  • Explain how growing up among American children influences children of migrants.
  • What is the most important lesson you learned from your parents?
  • Were you more like your father or mother as a child?
  • What do you think you needed the most as a child?
  • What are the common problems between parents and adolescents?
  • Have you ever been a victim or took part in school bullying?
  • What are the consequences of growing up too fast?
  • Describe a life-changing experience from your childhood.
  • How to motivate children to study based on their early childhood performance?
  • Does having a pet teach children responsibility?
  • Did you have any secrets that you kept from your parents?
  • What is it like growing up in a small town with big ambitions?
  • What tips could you give your parents if you went back in time?
  • What advice would you give yourself if you went back in time?
  • How did your race and ethnicity affect your childhood?
  • Describe your childhood hobby and the achievements in it.
  • How do childhood problems might affect adult life?
  • Is it more challenging to grow up as a girl or a boy?
  • Who was your role model as you were a child?
  • What challenges did you face while growing up, which you think others didn’t?
  • What was the biggest mistake you made in your childhood?
  • What are the psychological effects of family issues on children?
  • How well do you remember your childhood?
  • What are the main reasons for suicide among teenagers?
  • Describe your best childhood friend and your relationship.
  • How does growing up in a low-income family affect one’s attitude to money?
  • Why do children lie to their parents?
  • What is your brightest childhood memory?
  • Why do teenagers tend to be rebellious and sometimes violent?
  • What would you change in your childhood if you had a chance?
  • Describe the moment when you felt you had grown up.
  • How has your music taste changed since you were a kid?
  • How to instill tolerance in children from an early age?
  • Growing up without a father made me a stronger person.
  • What was your dream profession when you were a child?
  • What is the most unforgettable present you received as a kid?
  • Were you popular in middle and high school?
  • What is your earliest childhood memory, and why do you think it’s this one ?
  • What is the best advice you have received as a child?
  • How successful were you academically as a child?
  • How to avoid and prevent bullying at school?
  • What experience in your family affected you the most and why?
  • Did your parents support your dreams and ambitions?
  • How can you describe your relationships with your siblings?
  • What were the common traits of teenagers of your generation ?
  • What is the most valuable object that reminds you of childhood?
  • Describe your first love and what you felt about it?
  • How did your family affect your current values?
  • Videogame Addiction and Its Impact on Children.
  • Can a single parent provide enough attention and care to their children?
  • Who was the closest to you in your family?
  • What are the things your parents have done you are grateful for?
  • What opportunities do you wish you could have as a kid?
  • What were your phobias in childhood or as a teenager ?
  • What were your strong and weak sides when you were a child?
  • What do you want your future family to be like?
  • How to detect and prevent child abuse at early stages?
  • Why do teenagers try smoking , drugs, or alcohol?

📜 Growing Up Essay Example #1

To make it easier for you, our experts prepared a couple of childhood and growing up essays. Check them below!

Everyone defines growing up in their way. It is more than just physical changes that you notice in the mirror. As for me, growing up means accepting responsibilities, being able to take care of somebody, and becoming independent. I remember the first time my parents asked me to babysit my little sister. Rachel was a silent kid, but I was nervous anyway. I wanted my parents to come home as early as possible because I was afraid of the responsibility. I felt as if they entrusted her life and safety to me, just a teenager. Some weeks later, I discovered that it was not terrifying me anymore. We had fun together; I taught her how to play games and enjoyed our time together. Rachel was also the first person I learned to take care of. I helped my sister with her homework, picked her from school, and gave her advice when she asked for it. The feeling that I do it without waiting for something in return taught me a lot. I changed my attitude towards people, learned how to be kind and generous. Now I am sure that I will be able to nurture my kids in the future. Moving to a college dormitory made me independent. I thought I was an adult fully responsible for myself at high school, but I was wrong. Living alone and being in charge of my life motivated me to change a lot. I learned how to spend time alone, value it and take care of my health. I also started managing my time rationally. Independence doesn’t mean you don’t need other people in your life. It means you can rely on yourself in any case. I can’t say that I am a one hundred percent adult at this stage of my life. I am sure that I grew up helping my parents, my sister, and myself. I changed a lot. But many challenges are waiting for me in the future. Taking up more responsibilities and facing difficulties will help me on my way.

📜 Growing Up Essay Example #2

Growing up asian in america.

Asian-American children are a vulnerable group that needs protection. My experience is an excellent example of the difficulties that Asian-Americans might face in their childhood. As an Asian, I faced bullying at school, low expectations regarding my future career, and troubles with self-identification. High school was a hard time for me. 21.7% of Asians report being bullied at school . The rate is the highest among all the ethnic groups. I didn’t report my own experience as I didn’t want to seem weak. I was bullied because I studied harder than many other students and cared about my grades too much. I am sure that I would have been bullied less if I were a white child. There is nothing wrong with being ambitious regardless of your ethnicity. My family and friends didn’t support my aspiration to become a doctor. They said that no one from my family went to college and that it was too hard to be admitted. It was challenging to keep my motivation without support. Even when they knew I had all the chances to receive financial aid, they just didn’t believe it. It was always hard for me to identify myself. I don’t know if I am like children from China as I have never been there. I was born and raised in the United States. But my motherland does not feel like home too. I don’t look like many of my peers, and my family has a different lifestyle and traditions. I don’t think that I belong to any of the communities. In conclusion, my experience shows how a childhood of an Asian-American kid might look like. I feel that further generations will confront similar challenges facing society and themselves. That is why I want to raise attention to the mentioned problems and change people’s attitudes.

We hope that our article clarified what a growing up essay should look like.

We will be glad to learn about your experience of writing such an essay! Share your thoughts below in the comment section.

This is it for today. Good luck and happy writing!

Home — Application Essay — Liberal Arts Schools — Unearthing the Past

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Unearthing the Past

  • University: Stanford University

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Published: Jul 18, 2018

Words: 466 | Pages: 1 | 3 min read

Stanford University, with its reputation for academic excellence, is the perfect institution for pursuing my passion for history. As someone who has always been fascinated by the past, I have chosen to major in History, a field that will allow me to explore and understand the world around me.

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I have always been intrigued by how the events of the past shape the present, and I have constantly sought out opportunities to learn more about history. Reading books and watching documentaries have been a great source of inspiration, but it was during a high school history class that I realized I wanted to study history in greater depth.

The more I learned about history, the more I became aware of its relevance in understanding contemporary issues. I was particularly drawn to how history can provide insights into the social, cultural, and political issues that we face today. For instance, studying the Civil Rights Movement in the United States helped me appreciate the struggle for equality, and its relevance in addressing current racial issues.

I am particularly interested in the history of the Americas, particularly the history of colonialism, imperialism, and the African diaspora. I believe that this interest stems from my own background as an immigrant and a person of color. By studying these subjects, I hope to understand the struggles of marginalized communities and how they have shaped the world we live in today.

Stanford University's History Department stands out for its faculty's diverse research interests and its interdisciplinary approach. I am particularly drawn to the department's emphasis on global history, social and cultural history, and the history of science and technology. These research areas align with my interests and will provide a well-rounded education that will prepare me for a career in academia, public policy, or law.

Moreover, Stanford's commitment to providing research opportunities for undergraduates will allow me to engage in hands-on research that will further enhance my knowledge and skills. I am excited about the possibility of working with faculty and graduate students in research projects that explore the intersections of history and the social sciences.

My passion for history extends beyond the classroom. I have been actively involved in my local historical society, where I have volunteered as a tour guide and research assistant. This experience has allowed me to engage with history in a more practical way and appreciate the challenges and rewards of archival research.

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Studying history at Stanford University will provide me with the knowledge and skills I need to contribute meaningfully to society. I am excited about the prospect of learning from world-class faculty, engaging with a diverse student body, and participating in cutting-edge research. With the resources and support provided by Stanford's History Department, I am confident that I will achieve my academic and professional goals.

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Toxic Beauty Standards Can Be Passed Down

A series of faces are seen as though through mirrors. Each are cast in purple with red lips and stare into a middle distance.

By Alexandra D’Amour

Ms. D’Amour is a writer based in California. She writes about motherhood and matriarchy.

When my best friend and I lived together 13 years ago, our shared bathroom had a handful of products: soap, tanning lotion, deodorant, toothpaste, potpourri and maybe, occasionally, a face cream that one of us found on sale at Walgreens. No serums, no toners, no anti-aging products. We never considered we wouldn’t be young forever. Our bank accounts were empty, our pores were clogged, our mascara wands were dry — but we were 22, and we were allowed to be messy. We were allowed to be young.

Our generation came of age during the ’90s toxic diet culture. Millennials weren’t taught to fear aging; we were taught to fear fat. Butter was our enemy . When we watched Victoria’s Secret Angels walk down the runaway, we loathed ourselves. Disordered eating may have been a psychiatric issue, but it was also symptomatic of a social problem . And if you had a mother who internalized diet culture and projected it onto her children, the damage could also happen from within the family. Researchers have found that mothers who encourage weight loss or food restriction or even express dissatisfaction with their body weight may lead to their daughters’ becoming more likely to have eating-related problems.

As my generation grew up and became more conscious of the impacts of diet culture, we began to openly celebrate and encourage body positivity. Many of us became aware of our own body dysmorphia. We began seeing clearly how we were manipulated to shrink and hate every part of our bodies.

And yet, even if parts of society came to terms with natural bodies, the same cannot be said for the natural process of women aging. Wrinkles are the new enemy, and it seems Gen Z — and their younger sisters — are terrified of them. A recent video on TikTok that has garnered more than eight million views features a 28-year-old woman showing her “raw,” procedure-free face, meaning no Botox or fillers. As some women and girls cheered on her bravery, others were left horrified. “Praying I’ll never look like that,” one comment read.

Gen Z-ers are being introduced to the idea of starting treatments early as “ preventative” treatment. They are growing up in a culture of social media that promotes the endless pursuit of maintaining youth — and at home, some of them are watching their mothers reject aging with every injectable and serum they can find. Jessica DeFino , a beauty writer, recently coined the term Serum Mom to describe a mother who is “obsessed with meeting a certain standard of beauty and nurtures the same obsession in her children.”

For me, lessons of preventative skin care came from social media, not my mother. I was a few years shy of 30, digging into Instagram and series like Emily Weiss’s Into The Gloss’s Top Shelf . My skin care regimen suddenly became a 10-part routine, each step promising beauty and extended youth.

Since then, the rise of TikTok seems to have increased the way anti-aging beauty standards are consumed and internalized. Many girls and women now have endless access to social media posts of skin-care purchase “hauls” and plastic surgery before-and-after slide shows.

There’s a nickname for tweens and teenagers who have been influenced by social media to get into skin care — Sephora Kids . Johanna Almstead, a fashion industry friend, tells me that in her local mothers group chat, nearly every mom had “Skincare, skincare, skincare!” on the holiday gift lists they were given — by their fifth graders. Johanna’s 10-year-old daughter doesn’t have access to social media, but she is exposed to this skin care obsession through friends, who are copying TikTok beauty influencers and whose parents are buying the products for them — acids, peels and toners — even though many of these products are meant for actually aging or acne-prone skin .

Representatives for the pricey brand Drunk Elephant ( a tween favorite ) posted on Instagram in December a list of products safe for kids and tweens. Buying a 10-year-old a colorfully packaged lip gloss or adult moisturizer may seem trivial, but it seems to me it can create a pipeline to a 15-year-old discussing forehead wrinkles on TikTok. We need to be wary of how the cosmetics industry can manipulate both mothers and kids, and how by backing it, we as mothers create a new set of worries for our children.

The anti-aging craze comes with the same toxicity as diet culture does. Serum Moms didn’t create ageism, just as our mothers didn’t create diet culture. But considering the speed at which social media is pushing ever more unattainable beauty standards onto children, it’s time for us to consider our moral obligation to minimizing damage for the next generation.

Mothers are both victims and perpetrators of a culture that sells women the lie that we aren’t enough exactly as we are. And yet, if a mother’s insecurity can fuel her daughter’s own self-loathing, a mother’s radical self-love might just protect and even heal her daughter from a toxic culture. When I ask the few friends who haven’t gotten Botox why they haven’t, they tell me it’s because they love how their mothers are aging and how they embrace it. They don’t fear aging because their mothers don’t (or didn’t). Culture may set the tone for unattainable beauty standards, but we mothers and the women around us have power to change the trajectory of our daughters’ insecurities and internal monologue.

I still think about my weight every day, but I fear that the impact of Serum Moms and anti-aging culture will be worse than the lessons I learned as I was growing up. I wish I grew up with women who truly nourished themselves — mothers who ate when they were hungry; mothers who ate toast, pasta and birthday cake; mothers who simply ate. I look at my daughter’s beautiful face, cheeks full of butter and innocence, and I want her to know that she’s enough as is.

Alexandra D’Amour is a writer based in California. She writes about motherhood and matriarchy.

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